Monday Morning Funnies…

Krista’s grandmother Shirley (who our kids call Gigi) sent this email to us last week…she had me cracking up in my chair.  I hope her perspective on a “typical day” here in Nicaragua makes you smile this morning 🙂

This is supposed to be funny !  A Joke on me !     . . .     My  Daughter Sue took me to US. Embassy today to renew my passport.  We had a driver dressed neatly, and Sue looked like a sophisticated secretary dressed in black.  She had called, checked for appt,  found out they opened @ 1 PM, but to come at 1:15, for no waiting.     . . .   We first went down the Hgwy for the passport picture.  As we drove, I realized with horror,   that I did not have my tooth in.  (Replacement for broken tooth when I cracked it on frozen candy bar Leaving a space).  Sue was chewing gum, so we designed a gum tooth.   Ha ha. . . . Then no glasses, take my glasses off, and I was shocked !  My makeup on my eyes made one eye go up,  and one eye down.  I looked drunk, or incapacitated. Or worse yet,  very old.  . . . So with my eyes askew, my crooked mouth with no smile,  bright red lipstick,   I had my picture taken. . . .              Next step,  get the old lady delivered to the embassy. in a high van, in front of the line of 75 people waiting.         . . . Our driver brought a small step ladder.  It was normally just one large step up or down,   but 3 steps  for me,  with artificial hips. . . . So we pulled up, and i got out, hearing my daughter say we have an appt. and I can’t stand in line long.  The officer ran to get me a wheelchair,  and they pushed me in,  passed all others with gaping mouths. . . . . .  They took my umbrella away ( it did look like a weapon).  But didn’t check the beeper, when it went off.  Of course, I had a metal wheelchair.  Ha ha . . . .    Once inside Sue took care of the paper work and payment, etc., and I rode merrily out without a word, passed a large group still waiting.   . . .  I told Sue,  I could have a Russian accent for all they know,  never asking the old lady to speak.  . . . Once outside, in reverse, in my wheelchair  I passed the gaping mouths,  to my ladder beside the van,  up 3 steps and away we went. . . .    . . . The accident we passed on the way in,  was still waiting for the police to come.  And, it started to rain.    . . . What a pleasant day.  I am lucky to be 84.   Ha ha.     Luv, Shirley